


One Minute

by WhiteWolf1284



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: (can we make that an actual tag lol), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff and Smut, F/M, Gen, Megs and Roxanne are lowkey hoes for each other, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mild Language, Minion is so done, Pre-Canon, Walking In On Someone, alright, anyways lemme stop cluttering the tags, ay i updated with a Wayne chapter, because i have a feeling megamind curses, but roxanne is a supportive girlfriend, dont worry, fuck how do i tag this, he just never did it in canon because its a kids movie, i dont even know what this is, i just wanted a moment where Minion gets traumatized for eternity, i kept arguing with myself whether or not i should change the rating but i kept it mature, im just traumatizing everyone in the damn story, im not sure if i can put pre canon here but, mostly the smut, smut time, so this is definitely self indulgent, whoops i accidentally tortured megamind with anxiety, without death or anything, yes he was there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:15:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24956692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiteWolf1284/pseuds/WhiteWolf1284
Summary: basically Minion walks in on some shit and gets scarred for life
Relationships: Megamind & Minion, Megamind/Roxanne Ritchi
Comments: 21
Kudos: 90





	1. Minion's POV

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. i dont know what this is but im lowkey enjoying it  
> 2\. cmon yall this is my first Megamind fic i gotta make it at least a little smutty
> 
> (edit: so i edited one of the sentences because im working on a part two in Megamind's perspective and one of the dialogue's here doesnt make sense with the rest akjsfksd fuck)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minion walks in on some shit. chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry for always fucking up the notes, im still sort of new to this platform and dont know how everything works lol

He was gone for ONE MINUTE. ONE.

Okay, well, no, it was probably like, five minutes, but to Minion it felt like one. So he’s referring to it as one minute and you can’t stop him.

_One goddang minute, are you_ ** _kidding me-_** they could’ve at _least_ waited until after the kidnapping, for evil’s sake!

  
  
  


_ Okay, normally Minion is slightly oblivious to the “feel” of a room, but it was so blatantly obvious this time. There was just so much tension between Miss Ritchi and Sir today! It wasn’t even there in the beginning, either. One minute everything is fine and all of a sudden the room feels weird. _

_ But… Minion couldn’t tell what type of tension it was? Weird. Even though he was kind of oblivious sometimes, once he realized something was happening it was usually easy to find what it was. But today is different. Maybe they were fighting? Yeah, he wasn’t used to the tension of seeing two people in the middle of a silent argument, so that was probably it. _

_ Minion wondered if he could help them through it somehow, and hoped it wasn’t too serious. Minion had a sneaking suspicion of some type of romantic relationship at play, and he was quite happy about it. Though, the evil plot was going well so far. Maybe it was just Minion’s imagination? _

_ Usually during their times of playful banter, Minion kind of tuned them out unless his name is mentioned, though some random words and sentences tended to end up penetrating his ears. _

_...aND METROCITY WILL BE MINE… _

_...you’re so predictable… _

_...using your female wiles on me wON’T WORK, Miss Ritchi… _

_...oh yeah? Prove it…  _

_ Wait, what was with that last line? It sounded weird... What did Sir say before then? Minion stopped staring at the single pixel in the middle of the screen he was monitoring and turned around in his bowl. But Sir was walking towards the laser in the middle of the room, silent and… was that determination? Oh boy. And Miss Ritchi looked downright  _ smug. _ What had been going on in the past few minutes? As Sir began tinkering with their latest doomsday machine for a few moments, Minion was about to ask what they were saying until Sir himself broke the silence. _

_ “Ah, Minion, I believe there’s a screw missing here. Could you grab a spare from the lab please?” Biting his lip, he continued. “And the drill.”  _

_ Hm, that was weird. Usually when something small like this happened he would snap at Minion about forgetting a screw and demand he go fetch one. Minion never took it personally, of course; Sir had told him on numerous, more emotional occasions how much he loved and appreciated the fish. He just acts the way he does because he believes that it makes him seem more intimidating (at least, as intimidating as he wanted to be to the public eye. Sir could actually be scary if he wanted to). So you can imagine Minion’s surprise when he uttered the word ‘please’ to Minion, especially in front of Miss Ritchi. _

_ “Oh.. okay Sir!” Minion walked out of the room. Time to find a spare screw… oh, and the drill. The drill was something he was never able to find these days. _

_ … _

_Goodness, Minion_ finally _found the drill. This time it was behind two toolboxes, which were situated under a table. How the drill ended up there was something he couldn’t tell you if he tried, but he found both items rather quickly this time, which was good. Minion made his way back to the room. Er, the “Evil Plot Room”, as Sir called it._

_ “Sir, I found the- OH GOOD GOD-” As quickly as he opened the door, he slammed it shut again, just barely seeing the couple’s eyes widen in horror. Welp, if Minion had any doubts about their relationship being real, those were thrown right out the window. _

_ Kissing. They were, in fact, kissing. Roughly. And Minion was 100% sure Sir had his hand up Miss Ritchi’s shirt- _ **_oh god he was gonna be sick-_ **

  
  
  


And y’know what? Contrary to popular belief, Minion’s and Sir’s relationship wasn’t Servant/Master, but rather… they were more like best friends. Brothers, even. Like, imagine you have a sibling. Very close to them, were there for each other through thick and thin, all that. Then you walk in on that sibling having almost-sex. With one of your only friends.

Yep, Minion was definitely scarred for life now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> F in the chat for Minion
> 
> Bonus:  
> Minion: I was gone for ONE MINUTE. ONE!  
> Megs: WE THOUGHT YOU WOULD BE GONE FOR TEN  
> Minion: THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT ANY BETTER  
> Roxanne: BOTH OF YOU STOP SCREAMING BEFORE I TAPE SOMEONES MOUTH SHUT  
> Megs: ...is it gonna be me tho-  
> Minion: IM GOING TO BED


	2. Wayne's POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One Minute, but from Wayne's POV. Yes, he was there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow guys, i actually stopped being a lazy weeb and wrote this! and guess what? i actually started writing out Megamind's POV too! just gonna finish it and edit it, so maybe ill post it in a week or two?

God, Wayne was _ really _ regretting his New Year's resolution about never drinking again. He didn’t even drink alcohol all that often before! What was even the point!?

...Yeah, that resolution’s gonna have to wait for next year.

  
  
  
  


_ Wayne was expecting a kidnapping today, or at some point in the near future, which is why he was not surprised when he heard a gasp near the industrial area, and not-so-suspiciously from where he was sure Megamind’s lair was. Roxanne didn’t gasp all that often, but sometimes it happens after she wakes up. And, y’know, it’s been a while. (so long, apparently, that he didn’t even question how it sounded more like a groan than a gasp) _

_ There’s been a slow decrease in the amount of times Roxy has been kidnapped lately, and even more of a decrease in the amount of crime in general by Megamind. So the amount of crime in Metro City itself is pretty low right now. _

_ (At least, the crimes Wayne knew about.) _

_ That being said, this usually only happened when Megamind had a very big, elaborate plot planned out. This also basically guaranteed that Roxy would be there because the little guy never missed a chance to show off in front of her. _

_ Wayne has his suspicions of why, but it’s not like he’s gonna say anything. _

_ Anyways, Wayne was actually excited today for multiple reasons. First off, he got to see the gang all together again, which hasn’t happened in quite a while. Second, whenever Megamind had a big plan like this he was always really excited, and that made Wayne excited because… Megamind’s moods are contagious. Let’s be real here. _

_ And third, one of Wayne’s friends who happens to be a police officer had told him recently about a time where everyone had to be really stealthy, and even though it definitely wasn’t needed for Wayne to defeat Megamind, it sounded pretty fun! He considered the fact that being sneaky might not be something Megamind had planned and might ruin the entire thing, but Megamind always liked surprises, even when they weren’t necessarily wanted. So why not? _

_ Wayne flew to the industrial building (he thinks it was a factory once but he isn’t sure), and has to physically stop himself from busting into one of the many rooms through the ceiling. Dang, this really was just routine to him wasn’t it? He couldn’t tell if this was bad or good but something in his gut made him feel like it was the former. Eh, he could deal with it later, right now it was time to be stealthy! _

_ Wayne flew veeery stealthily across the side of the building to the place where the rustle of fabric and leather boots was the loudest. And he veeery stealthily used his super speed to fly around through the building (oh hey, Minion was in the lab. He seemed to be looking for something. Oh, maybe it was that drill he was always complaining about? Wayne found the drill on a very high shelf behind a toolbox, and it was obviously put there on purpose but to make it easier he put it under the nearest table behind some more toolboxes because that little fish doesn’t deserve such suffering) and to the door of the room he found earlier. _

_ Wayne opened the door, ready to hide behind the array of monitors and controls on the side of the room when he saw something he  _ really  _ was not supposed to see. _

_   
_ _   
_ _ He saw, to be specific, one Roxanne Ritchi, tied to the chair like always, but with a look on her face that can be seen as a mix of pleasure and that one “damn it” face she always has when something doesn’t go her way. This is already questionable, but then Wayne looks down. _

_ He then sees one Megamind whatever-his-last-name-is, basically sitting in Roxanne’s lap, a hand up her blouse and another hand somewhere in her skirt Wayne couldn’t see (thank god). And he had the most  _ **_evil_ ** _ smirk on his face. Like, he didn’t even get that smirk when one of his plans actually worked somehow. That was pleasure, and an unbelievable amount of smugness, pressed right into Roxanne’s neck. Along with sharp teeth, and a very pink tongue. _

_ Oh god. That. Okay. Um. Wayne was not expecting this. I mean it was obvious these two had severe crushes on each other (if this were a romance movie Wayne would’ve started throwing popcorn at the screen years ago), but since when had they actually gotten together?! Wayne briefly considered the fact that what Megamind was doing might not be consensual, but that thought went right through the window. His little buddy would never do that! And Roxanne wasn’t showing any signs of struggle so... _

_ Wayne needed to leave. He needed to get out of here, and never return. _

_...Okay, he’ll eventually have to return, but dang is it gonna be awkward. Wait, no, neither of them will even know about this! He’s still using his super speed! Oh that makes it so much worse. _

_ Wayne quickly flies back out, and disables his super speed when he gets home, too busy contemplating what he just walked in on to realize the horrible fate he just set in motion for the sweet little fish in the lab. _

  
  
  
  


...Why did Wayne feel like he was forgetting something? He took another sip of his whiskey. Eh, it was probably just the alcohol.

As Wayne finally connected the dots, about 15 minutes later, he visibly winced and dropped the glass. Sighing from both the spilled liquor on his pristine white carpet, and his horrible mistake, it was times like these when he wished he could rewind time instead of stop it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i like to imagine that after the movie where everyone is friends, there's a game of truth, dare, or drink going on and wayne just drunkenly reveals all this, and then he gets at least 6 different glasses thrown at him lmao
> 
> also, i plan on the next bit being a lot more smutty than these last two, so watch out for that btw
> 
> ...alright, last thing. if anyone reading this knows why i mentioned the sharp teeth on Megamind, then lets sob together in the corner because we all know LTA aint coming back ;-; i just figured i should pay tribute to that series cuz its awesome.


	3. Megamind's POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One Minute, but Megamind's POV. In a way, its also Roxanne's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so the ending got significantly more emotional than i planned for. Megamind = emotions and anxiety i guess lmao. also, smut warning, because Megamind was one of the people who got walked in on, that means he was committing da sexy acts. also, i may or may not be working on an epilogue idea that came up in the comments of the last chap.

God, why did he hide the drill on a shelf?! Really, he should’ve put it inside that broken wall panel, but no, Megamind just  _ had _ to go and be  _ lazy _ about it.

He and Minion are about to have a very awkward conversation aren’t they?

  
  
  
  


_ Like most other kidnappings, Megamind was bantering with Roxanne. Because that’s one of the best parts about kidnapping her. However, this time around, the banter was taking a turn into flirting territory. _

_...Oh who was he kidding, they were flirting like their lives depended on it. But can you really blame them? And, anyways, they were in a relationship now, so it’s fine. It was a secret one but it still  _ existed . _ And Minion wasn’t even paying attention, so it’s totally fine. Yep. (damn his insistent anxiety.) _

_ Anyways, Megamind was, again, complaining about Roxanne never screaming during a kidnapping. Because really, her screams were  _ **_divine_ ** _. So why was it he could never make her scream?  _ _ When they weren’t in bed that is. But those screams are different. And they come from him more often than not. _

_ “Scream? Please, you can’t even make me gasp. The last time that happened was when you caught me in an alleyway and I thought you were an actual dangerous person.” Roxanne smirked and dammit, she  _ knew  _ what she was doing. Well, two could play at that game. _

_ “Y’know, Miss Ritchi, I’ll be the first to admit I haven’t made you scream during a kidnapping just yet,” Megamind walked over and leaned down, his face just inches from hers. “But I can make you gasp.” _

_ Oh he was so glad he practiced his evil voice in the mirror so much. Because with a few tweaks it could easily fall into the ‘sultry’ category of voice tones and he was definitely using that to his advantage right now. _

_ “Oh yeah? Prove it.” Roxanne smirked at him. Ooh, was this a challenge? Perhaps one of those social cues he spent so much time researching? It certainly seemed like it. _

_ Not even 5 months ago, Megamind probably would have had a panic attack over that. He resisted saying he was pathetic for it. Roxanne had actually significantly improved his mental state, probably more than she realized. He wasn’t as anxious about everything and didn’t feel as insecure. Which is why he made the bold move of making Minion sparse for a little while. _

_ Megamind smirked right back, and he saw such joyful anticipation flash in her eyes- yes, it was definitely a social cue. _

_ His gaze flicked to the impressive laser that would surely kill Metro Man this time and let chaos reign across the city- wait, no, Roxanne said he can’t try and kill Metro Douche anymore. Megamind already knows by now that’s practically impossible, but just in case, he does tone down the fatality level of his evil plots a little. _

_ So his gaze flicks to the impressive laser that will surely  _ defeat ( _ there, that sounds better _ )  _ Metro Man, then back to Roxanne, before turning around and walking to the control panel installed into the side of the weapon. To anyone else the silence following Roxanne’s last statement would probably seem pretty awkward, but to him it was just filled with lust. And as much as he wanted to jump her and fuck her senseless, Minion was still in the room. Obviously he couldn’t fuck Roxanne senseless in front of Minion (Megamind did not realize how big a turn off that would be until now), so he enabled the trap of sorts he set up earlier as a small ‘just in case’. _

_ (It’s not as if he expected it to happen somehow or anything, hahahah no of course not) _

_ He spends a few small seconds tinkering with the machine before speaking up. _

_ “Ah, Minion. I believe there’s a screw missing here. Could you grab a spare from the lab please?” He bit his lip nervously. “And the drill.” _

_ That was probably the worst excuse Megamind has ever made, but Minion, like the faithful little fish he is, doesn’t seem to question it. _

_ “Oh.. okay Sir!” Megamind watched as the metal doors shut behind the aquatic alien, then focused on Roxanne who had an eyebrow raised in question. _

_ He chuckled darkly; he noticed in the past that seems to get her going quite a bit. “Well, you did say to prove it, and I’m obviously not backing down from a challenge like that. I simply changed the circumstances of the room to my advantage.” Megamind shrugged and walked towards her, painfully slow, his cape hovering behind him just off the ground. He honestly wanted to devour her, but oh how fun teasing was. She was getting redder every second! Oh how he loved this. _

_ “Well, I suppose that’s fair. What are you going to do now that you have the advantage, while we’re all alone, with me at your mercy?” _

_ Finally, he reached the chair she was tied to and leaned down, invading her personal space as he always does. He leans ever so close to her ear, and he desperately wants to clamp his teeth down but holds himself back. _

_ “Well, Miss Ritchi… right now, I’m going to make you gasp. Then, later, I’m going to make you do so much more.” Megamind whispers, leaning the slightest bit closer, lips just barely grazing her ear. She shivered under him.  _

_ “I’m going to make you moan and scream my name until you can’t even speak anymore, to the point where gasps are meaningless in the euphony of beautiful noises escaping your throat.” Roxanne’s eyes have long since clenched shut, and she appears to be holding back the ‘euphony of beautiful noises’ Megamind was talking about seconds earlier. He hadn’t even touched her yet! Maybe he should be practicing dirty talk rather than normal talking. _

_ Finally,  _ finally,  _ he bites her earlobe, then slowly trails kisses down her jaw and eventually to her lips, locking together in a passionate match of dominance. Surprising, since he was clearly taking the lead today, but Megamind wasn’t anything if not determined. He’d get his precious Roxanne to submit eventually. _

_ He moved to sit in the middle of her thighs, but not in her lap. He was already hard right now, and any type of pressure against that area would no doubt draw out some type of noise from both of them, so he stayed away for now. _

_ Breaking the kiss, he starts kissing down her neck, slipping a gloved hand under the hem of her shirt to trail lightly up her torso. He hears her inhale harshly as he gives a small nip to her collarbone, moving back up the other side of her neck, teeth barely grazing the skin. Megamind’s free hand sneaked under her skirt to grab at her luscious ass, and he heard a small squeak. Roxanne was barely holding herself back now. _

_ The hand up her shirt lazily circled the clothed nipple, then sneaked under the fabric to touch the sensitive skin. He snuck a glance at Roxanne from his place at the side of her neck. _

_ Her face was scrunched up in pleasure, and also intense concentration. She was putting up more of a fight than he expected, and he was basking in it. But he realized their time was running out soon. Minion would be back in about 6 more minutes, and they would need time to clean themselves up a little. As much as he wanted to prolong this, his want to not be caught in the act by his fishy friend was bigger. _

_ All at once, he pinched her nipple, finally grinded his hips against hers, and bit down as hard as he dared against her neck, and Roxanne made the most beautiful noise. A mixture of a moan and a gasp, which sounded a lot like his name. He let out an appreciative whine of his own, and smiled against her neck, before licking gently to ease the pain of the bite a little. He shifted to bring his head level to hers, then pressed his lips against the face that was already advancing towards his. Roxanne seemed slightly annoyed by the fact she had lost their mini-contest, but happy (and thoroughly aroused) all the same. Ready to make a smug remark about succeeding in his endeavor and promising to continue this later, Megamind was just about to pull away when the doors opened. _

_ “Sir, I found the- OH GOOD GOD-” The door slammed shut as suddenly as they were opened. Roxanne jolted in her seat and Megamind let out a surprised squeak before jerking away and falling flat on his ass, then giving a groan of pain instead. _

_ “Um.” Megamind looked up at Roxanne from his spot on the floor. But she shared the same horrified look as him. Usually, in bad situations, Megamind would be panicking while she attempted to calm him down and make him think logically. So, since she was usually the type to think instead of freak out, Megamind was very disturbed to find a face of uncontrolled panic on her face.  _

_ Well. It was controlled compared to Megamind’s expression though. _

  
  
  
  


Megamind untied Roxanne quickly, murmuring quick apologies and her repeatedly informing him that this wasn’t his fault and he didn’t need to apologize. But this very much was his fault, no matter what she said.

Any type of arousal has long faded from his mind as he untied her ankles. So, not only was their secret out, Minion was probably extremely traumatized. Oh hell, he still thought Megamind was a virgin until now. Now he would have to sit through the inevitable ‘talk’ that he had already been through with Warden long ago, plus the also inevitable argument about why the whole thing had been kept secret, and oh Minion would hate him  _ so much _ , and-

He abruptly stopped his ranting (turns out he was saying all that out loud) at a warm hand grabbing his bicep. Turning, he registered it as Roxanne’s hand, who had toned down the panic on her face and cleaned herself up.

“Megs, calm down, alright? Minion would have to know eventually; he just happened to learn about it in a way nobody would've preferred.”

“But it easily could’ve been avoided if I just-”

“Yes, Megamind, it could’ve been avoided,” he was 2 seconds away from drowning in his despair at that when she continued, “but it’s already happened, and we can’t change the past.”

Megamind murmured something about time travel but she ignored it.

“All we can do now is clear everything up and explain. But in order for us to do that you’re gonna need to calm down, okay?”

Oh, how he loved Roxanne. He wasn’t going to say it out loud yet (actually he was 93.7% sure he murmured it before taking a nap once and she heard, but she smiled so he assumed it was okay and fell asleep), but he loved her and this was one of the reasons why. If it had been literally anyone else, he would still be freaking out, but instead he found himself taking deep breaths and genuinely calming down.

“...okay.” Megamind finally stuttered out after a few long seconds of breathing and she smiled comfortingly. And no matter how awkward it was about to get, no matter how betrayed Minion would feel, Megamind had a good feeling Roxanne would stick by him through it all.

  
  


...But really, it still bewildered him that she stuck around for the awkward and emotional conversation with Minion that followed. He supposed, for once, that the universe was saying sorry for putting him through the torture that was his life by gifting him with this absolute angel of a woman.

And he was ever thankful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roxanne would be an excellent, supportive girlfriend and everyone knows this. im jealous of this pairing sometimes. also why do i make Megamind suffer like this, its just making me and everyone else sad jhasgkffgh


End file.
